Hey ASOS, it’s time we had a chat.

Yeah, how about you bring your friends Nasty Gal and Victoria’s Secret too?

This whole “let’s send Thea 91823983 emails a day to try to sell her shit” thing isn’t really working.

In fact, it’s kind of making me angry.

Especially when I have to wake up to 18 retailer emails just from the past six hours.

Instead of making me shop with you, it’s actually making me hate you.

I hate to break it to you, but I think we’re going to have to end things.

As in, UNSUBSCRIBE.

But it’s weird… it’s like you guys make that REALLY difficult.

So here let’s make this clear – 1 email once a week: fine.

Multiple emails everyday: bad.

Love, my bank account.