1. It’s just a little sneeze. It’s just allergies! 2. I’m fine, I can go to work. 3. Oh hmmm, I might have a little cough here. 4. NO, ILLNESS, YOU WILL NOT OVERTAKE ME. 5. It’s not even that big of a deal. 6. Hi Target, I’ll take one of every single anti-cough medicine you have….
Early 20’s: I have to go to the mall and pick out a new outfit to wear! <3 Late 20’s: Do I have to put on pants for this show? Early 20’s: Let’s get there when doors open. I love this opening band!! Late 20’s: I literally give zero fucks about this opening band. Early…
Currently when you type “oil” into Google, “oil pulling” comes up before “oil change.” No. What is “oil pulling,” you ask? Well besides being totally fucking disgusting, it’s a supposed miracle for whiter teeth! A healthier liver! A skin-clearing miracle! Basically oil-pulling is supposed to turn you into Gwyneth Paltrow with Kate Upton’s tits and…
Hey ASOS, it’s time we had a chat. Yeah, how about you bring your friends Nasty Gal and Victoria’s Secret too? This whole “let’s send Thea 91823983 emails a day to try to sell her shit” thing isn’t really working. In fact, it’s kind of making me angry. Especially when I have to wake up to…
So my 25th birthday is this week, guys. And usually, I’m really pumped for my birthday. But now, I’m starting to feel really effing old. See, birthdays were cooler when my parents actually got me presents. And my grandma would send me a card with $25 in it. But now my birthday is just like…
